You're wondering where I've been? Well, I'm here to tell you that these past two months have been non-stop. The last part of 2017 has been bittersweet but after much thought, I would say more sweet than bitter. Every year, around my birthday, is always a time of reflection. I think about the people I surround myself with (also known as "My Tribe"), the decisions I made, the struggles I've endured along with my growth (because without struggle, there is no progress and trust me there will always be struggles).
As usual, I wait until the last minute to make plans because that's the indecisive Sagittarius within me and it wasn't any different with my 25th birthday. I contemplated for months on how to celebrate this milestone birthday, yet I did not solidify any plans until a month before. What I did know is that I wanted it to be in a different city (what's new) and memorable. Check and check. I went to Atlanta for a weekend and had an amazing time.
I never expressed this to anyone but there were many times were I didn't think I would make it to 25. I don't think it was because I thought I would die because of a tragedy, but simply because I couldn't envision myself as a 25 year-old. It's quite laughable the lofty goals and the high standards you set for yourself when you're a child. Here's what I had in mind when I was in high-school:
- Married and have kids by the age of 26
- Graduated from NYU's Tisch School of the Arts
- Be a fashion designer or fashion publicist like Kelly Cutrone, curating all of the hottest runway shows in New York& representing the dopest brands
- Traveled the world and visit each continent
- Owned three cars: Audi, Lexus, and Range Rover
- Be a photo journalist after gaining recognition as a fashion photographer
- Have fresh flowers in my apartment every week
- Maintain a Sunday ritual of yoga, smoothies, journaling/reading
Not to say that these goals are laughable (except for marriage and kids) but it's interesting the timeline I set for myself. I was in such a different headspace where I had an idea of what my life should look like. I put enormous pressure on myself on a daily basis and I'm always seeking to achieve my next goal that I don't always relish in the accomplishments that I have achieved. It may not have been in the time frame that I was hoping for, but nonetheless I am pretty damn successful! I credit this to being determined, hard-working, restless, and relentless.
You know what they say: the dream is free, but the hustle is sold separately!
I also have one of the best support groups ever. Whether it is my mother, who I've seen raise a child by herself, establish and maintain her own business, instill great morals and self-confidence within myself. My aunt, uncle, grandfather and my friends show me what family and friendship really mean. I continue to grow tremendously with their support and help as I navigate these years of self-discovery. As a young adult, I question my decisions, thoughts, and re-evaluate my goals and it is comforting to know that I am not alone. As I write this post, I am trying to hold myself accountable with my thoughts and replace "you" and "your" with "me," "myself," and "I."
2017 was the year of intention. I am claiming that 2018 is a year of execution.
Ok, this was not how I intended this post to go but here we are! Be on the look out for pictures from my birthday weekend! What are you claiming 2018 to be?
Next Up: Atlanta